The present.

I hate parents in general. And I think it's because of how terrible mine are. My mom is nice. But, she has so many problems and it makes it hard to talk to her. I love her so much. And could lose her at any minute. 

My father. Oh gosh. The worst thing that has ever happened to me. My least favorite person in the entire world. The source of my issues. The reason I have 4 attempted suicides. I hate him. It hurts to talk about how much I hate him. He treats everyone in my family like shit and I  have been willing to do anything to escape it. 

 I cling to Hunter and Ethan because I need someone to tell me that I'm good and have a reason to be here. I have Gabby and Kiley to put a smile on my face. I have Jackson to make me feel like I'm worth something and can be loved by someone. 

If it weren't for these people, I'd be gone. 

I would not be here. I'd be long gone and forgotten  by now.